i often feel as though
something big is out on the horizon
[if only i could find it
or at least take steps to walk towards it]
and when i fall into depression
that big thing is to be feared
fraught over
fought
the ‘impending doom’ flavor of hopelessness
[and with today’s national and international news
who could blame me for
only seeing the
worst]

but recently
i feel i need
recovery
from events and happenings
that have already happened
[and are kind of still happening]
to me

i’m exhausted
and they keep occurring
and the feeling of something coming
is only getting closer
and i don’t know how i can meet it
if i’m still absorbed in dealing with
what just happened…