my brain is mush
it’s creatively exhausted
not by creativity
but by
life
a year in poetry
September 5, 2024
when we first met
kip wasn’t sure
if they’d be able to be with me
long term
because i insited that i
didn’t like
dogs
but as they got to know me,
they saw how much i loved all animals
no matter what, so then they
started to share stories
of dogs being so good
and introducing me
to dogs here and there
and observing
and guiding
until the concept of us getting a dog
was raised, and i said “maybe”
that maybe, after volunteering with a shelter, became a “probably”
and then a “yes” with so many caveats
and then a “yes” with a couple of caveats
and by the time we helped Louka into our lives
those caveats were gone
and now i can’t even say whether i’m a dog or a cat person
in black and white terms
because i love all cats and all dogs
so so so so so so much
and i am so thankful to my kip
and my dogs
for teaching me just how wonderful
dogs are
September 4, 2024
write to the sounds of
indoor cats purring
outdoor dogs yipping
our dog boofing
even though she knows she oughtn’t
even though she’s trying so hard to not
but her little grumble/whine/barks
are so cute
it’s hard to scold her
especially because
i know
i can tell
she’s trying
she’s trying
she’s trying
September 3, 2024
the puppy’s barks are sharp
as she tries to get her ball out from under the radiator
and asks me to help her,
but the cat is on my lap
and i cannot give up this comfort and heat
on this chilly morning
after dropping my kip off at the airport
for a work trip, so we must endure
her plaintive wails
and scrambles to get the toy herself —
that is until i realize
she may need a similar comfort
as her kip is gone too
nevermind, she got the ball herself
she’s practically a grown a-dog now
September 2, 2024
i have quite a collection
of bird feathers i’ve found
only in our yard
only dropped for us
[maybe]
and i wish i could say thank you
to the jays who leave
these beautiful blues behind
to match my eyes
but i simply wash them
and dry them
and place them in the window sill
hoping they call my own
brazen glitter goth
loud corvid
personality
home
September 1, 2024
i’m lost in a dream
and the future as it seems
to spread out in front of
and behind me
and i still can’t get a good grasp
on the present, that’s the one thing
hidden away
lost
unfindable
irreplaceable —
the past keeps adding up
and the future is infinite
it is only the present as it is
that is only
one thing
August 31, 2024
keep on writing
keep on finding
what little things are left to find
in this world/state/city/life
and maybe, one day, someone else will want to read what you have to say
August 30, 2024
it’s
astounding
how much joy i get from video game music
and how little joy i get
from actual video games
what
in the world
is that all about?
August 29, 2024
getting up the gumption to ask for something
even if you’re completely ok with the answer being no
is the scariest thing
[or
am i more afraid
of the answer being
yes?]
August 28, 2024
fall is full of figs
and spooky season seasonings
and i’m beginning to like the autumn
because the heat of summer here sure is oppressive
and everything feels like it’s
waiting
but here comes the doing
the happening
the season that gets busier and busier
and i feel like
maybe
i can find myself
before it gets too cold