January 17, 2025

apparently
i first opened this version
of scrivener
in january of 2021.
or,
more specifically,
january 17
in the morning.

and i only noticed the “first opened” notification
on this january 17
today
in the morning
[though in the 7:00 hour, not the 8,
as was the case
in 2021]

and i still can’t get over
the passage of time,
nor the happenstance
and connection
in my life.
but
i think it’s interesting
when things just kind of
align
and line up
and i can take that however
i like

October 8, 2024

it still feels like the future
whenever i see the year
starting with a two
rather than a one
and it simply feels
unreal
to not have double zeros
between the first and last digit

i wonder if my brain will ever let go
of this harsh divide
between old millennium=safe
and new millennium=completely unknown

June 26, 2024

my whole concept of
the day of the week
is gone

is it wednesday?
is it a weekend?
have days ceased to be
and now we’re living off of
vibes alone?

someone help me
be a person
again

January 1, 2024

getting used to the
new spacing/
new calligraphy
of the four
at the end of the year,
promising myself
i’ll give grace to my own mind/fingers
for inevitably forgetting
during the first three to six months of this year
and letting myself have patience
with my own soul
as i get used to the inevitability
of the passage
of time

November 29, 2023

it’s still so damn wild to me
to see the numbers 2-0-2-3 —
it feels futuristic
it feels like fantasy
i never thought i’d see much farther
than those zeroes three
at the turn of the century
the full new millennium
i was convinced i’d die before i hit eighteen
but then nineteen/twenty/twenty-one, -two, -three
and now i’m solidly into my thirties
and we are solidly into the two thousand twenties
and it still seems so fake to me,
me, a person who still remembers all dated items
with the first nineteen already filled in;
the 90’s were never supposed to end,
but they’re so long ago now
and i just can’t seem to fit my brain in
that the world keeps turning
time keeps ticking
as much as it all is a mortal construction
we live in a society
and the society says
this is the year twenty twenty three

[nah, still seems fake to me]

September 30, 2023

September flew by
in a matter of seconds
days filled with
stress and driving
and planning and writing
and arriving
in time to say goodbye
and the weeks between now and back then
feel like blips
made of minutes that took forever
and this whole month
took no time at all