giving up on
one contest
for a guaranteed
expression
of self
giving up on
a new book club
(at least this month)
for connection
with spouse
with pup
with cat
with friend
giving up on
a couple of mornings
of poem-tidings
for sharing
my emotions
when they’re ready
to be written about
when they’re ready
to be shared
when they’re ready
when i’m ready
when
i’m
i am
red-eyed puppy
gazing soulfully
through her cone
trying to sleep
through pain
and excitement
trying to calm
herself
through rough times
and cat visits
and trying to occupy her time
through crate-rest boredom
how long does this puppy have to stay
without an outlet
for her puppy energy?
unaware what to write
this morning,
perhaps i’ll
just continue
diverging
learning
creating
etc.
dog calming music
calms the humans of the house
too
stop writing
for purpose
stop writing
for audience
stop writing
for rules
and structure
and rhyme scheme
and
just write
for expression
for emotion
for you
for you
[for me]
[i write for me
let that be what it will be]
the puppy
newly recovered from surgery
still overexerts herself in excitement
and panic
whenever the cat comes near
and i don’t know how to help her see
the cat will still be here when she is healthy
still bizarre to me
that people who do not know me
would want to read my poetry
but i suppose i’ll just keep posting it here
for anyone at all to see
it’s wild
the nighttime writing
so different from the morning
but still so much the same
i’d kindly lay myself aside
for a pup or cat or Kip
but the hardest thing i had to learn
was that my survival is their wish
course-correcting
my sail needs some attention
there are holes and rips and i can’t seem to get the tail-wind right
and i don’t know anything about sailing
so i don’t know if i’m getting this analogy at all accurate
but i do feel
like a little sailboat
in the midst of a great ocean
trying to catch a breeze
but the winds of executive function
keep blowing right through me
kipventures 