October 16, 2026

i did a thing
and i’m hesitant to say i did well
and that i’m good at it
because i still have two more evenings
but i suppose i can treat those two evenings
like i treated yesterday
and look at them as though this is all
a learning opportunity

i mean, that’s kind of what life itself is, isn’t it?
just one giant learning opportunity:
learning how to be a human
learning how to interact with others
learning what you love and what you don’t
learning how to say goodbye
learning how to live
learning how to learn

maybe?

September 17, 2026

i wish i could bottle certain feelings
and uncork and inhale them when needed

last night i had a moment of utter bliss
looking around, watching adults and artists
puppeteering giant buffalo around a warehouse in brooklyn
everyone concentrating
everyone knowing
it’s an illusion but also a very real spirit
that makes this whole herd work

it’s art and community and hope and strength
and imagination and wisdom and belief
and i damn near cried because i couldn’t believe
this is real life
this is better than i could have imagined
my time on earth
would be spent

helping native persons
helping the earth

with art and performance and everything i have ever wanted to do

i suppose i’m inhaling that bottled sense again this morning
writing about it
trying to express with words what words cannot express
but can, perhaps, capture a sample
or imitate for future use

for when i feel lost

for when i feel depressed

for when i have no hope

i can remember one hundred and sixty? seventy? eighty? people
some inside a puppet
some outside observers
learners
like me
all with one goal in mind: create conversation
for the betterment of everyone on this planet
every person, human and non-human,
and doing it with
art

art that took teams and teams to imagine and map out
and build and construct
and put final touches on
and doctor and make better
and teams to map out routes and talk with other groups
and performers and city officials and advertise so more people
will see and continue a conversation we are creating
we, this team, all voluntary, all wanting to bring to life
this art, this stampede, this dream,
this imagining

this honoring

i hope those who see from the outside tomorrow and saturday
see what i saw yesterday
feel what i felt yesterday

that it’s amazing to be
here
now

with people
with buffalo
with hope
with art
with life

let us let the earth continue to provide this magic

let us help the earth

let us help the magic

September 16, 2026

make
bad
art

we need more
human
bad art

or at least something filled with
life
and breath

art is life
life is art

ai is not currently life/breath/creativity

ai cannot make art

it can make amalgamations of other humans’ art
it can mix styles like paint
but that is just a technical ability

art is ephemeral and hard to describe

it needs life

in needs breath

it needs person-ness

so make bad art, because no matter how bad it is
it
is
still
ART

August 24, 2026

stop
getting distracted
by internet things
stop
distancing yourself from life
with silly video games
stop
avoiding things you actually want to do
by half-assedly doing basically any [and every] thing else

why can’t you just do
what you actually
truly want to do???

August 3, 2026

explore
and
expedite
every
human
experience

that’s the kips
that’s the kips

wanting to suck the marrow out of life
not miss out on one thing
but also
to achieve and advance in
the quickest amount of time
possible

like it’s a race

like it’s a contest

can the kips achieve
the
full human experience
by the time they hit
45?

[can the kips understand
that not every experience can be
caught, some are fleeting, and some
literally cannot happen until
old age is actually gotten]

[can the kips admit that
every human life is different
even
each other’s?]

July 29, 2026

at least
i’ve committed to the bit
for as long as i have
working memory

at least
i come from a long line
of folks who have
absolutely committed to the bit
even before that was a common phrase

at least
i have so much fun
committing to the bit

because joy is
one of the things
i want most out of life

at least
others have acknowledged
and admired
my ability to commit to the bit

i don’t know what i’d do
if it were
otherwise…

June 9, 2026

nothing
is for certain

everything
is random

but some things have a logic to them
that can be predicted —

success and family wealth
diet and exercise and general future health
queerness and hairstyle
etc.
etc.
etc.

predicted
but not for certain

because nothing
nothing
nothing
is for certain

[didn’t you read the beginning of this poem?]

May 14, 2026

we celebrated
ten years
and then we celebrated
thirteen and then we celebrated
just being married and boring together
and i love our life here
with ups and downs
and stresses and calm moments
and so many sillies —
my kip is my home
and my home is my kip
and we are kips together
on the same team
[la même équipe]
and we always will be

with love

May 3, 2026

breathe through
the pain
the panic
the day
the week
the month
the year
the administration
the takeover
the ugliness
the inhumanity
the world
the lifetime

[a life is meant to be lived
fully, not
breathed
through
until the end]

[if only those who made it this bad
did any meditation
of self-reflection
of their own damn actions]

April 5, 2026

i live my life based on the philosophy
i read in a tumblr post
once

the long and short of the text was that
after your were finished with a life
you got to what you thought were the pearly gates
of heaven
or hell
or limbo
or wherever
and you started to see,
though there was no one else there,
that you’d been here before
thousands upon millions upon billions of times
and it was revealed that you
are and were and would be
everyone

and every time you had been mean
you had simply been being mean
to a former [or future] iteration of yourself

and every time you had been kind
or received kindness
that was you
and you and you
all along

and it’s not that i can only thing about
the consequences of cruelty
or the benefits of kindness
if it is in relation to my own being

no

what got me about that philosophy
was the idea that
everyone around me
was so much closer than originally thought —

i spend so much time thinking i’m
a complete alien to the rest of the human race, that i
will never understand what someone is going through
and they certainly will never even try to see
what’s going on in my mind,
and everything
everyone
seems so damn foreign
and far, far away
and even when i think about
the interdependent web of all existence
there’s still a distance
i place between myself and my fellow [hu]man

but that one silly little tumblr post

it made my neighbor
and my ancestor
and the writer of the book i’m reading
and the anchor of the news show i’m fearing
and the baby in front of me
and the octogenarian on the other side of the world
and literally everyone in between
it made them all seem so much closer to me
in a sense of peace i had never before experienced

so i know that it’s probably not true

but what if it is?

and i tend to live my life based on “what ifs”
[as long as they don’t hurt anyone else]

and this particular “what if” has the tendency
to encourage
the opposite

so maybe think about it

or search out that og post
[it’s actually a pre-written short story called the egg by andy weir,
i just came across it on tumblr one day
as you do]

because i think it’s worth
the philosophizing
and the comfort
and the hope
it brings