how come i am so hyper-aware
of every moment in time
and how they will become memories
in the next moment

so much so that, even trying to experience them, i am often thinking
fifteen minutes[at least] into the future

i feel like i was barely in the moment
of looking forward to this trip
and only in it
for half a second
and now i’m back
and looking back on
experiences i know took time to have
but now they live only in my
memory