as the numbers steadily approach
24
the day in december i used to see your face
every year
[along with others
along with others]
my heart hiccups
as i think about seeing you
and remembering i can’t,
not in its living form anymore

it’s a lost loss
one from far away
but so closely held in both of our hearts

you wrote so many letters
to so many people
but you always managed to write to me
and make me feel like i was the only one

i love you i loved you i love you

[this poem has no end
because grief
goes on and on]