July 19, 2023

ever write poetry
with a rhyme scheme in your mind
from an un-written line,
one you decided wasn’t worth the fight/
the force of putting it in,
but the next line rhymes so fittingly
that you insert it just so —
and when you read the flow
you still speak it as though
that first line is still there
(you just don’t say it out loud)
and it all fits together
with phrases in your mind —
and you wonder
if a reader
who isn’t just you
could feel that it flows,
even though the flow
may not be as obvious
as it is to you…

anyone else do that too?

July 15, 2023

giving up on
one contest
for a guaranteed
expression
of self

giving up on
a new book club
(at least this month)
for connection
with spouse
with pup
with cat
with friend

giving up on
a couple of mornings
of poem-tidings
for sharing
my emotions
when they’re ready
to be written about
when they’re ready
to be shared
when they’re ready
when i’m ready
when
i’m

i am

July 11, 2023

stop writing
for purpose
stop writing
for audience
stop writing
for rules
and structure
and rhyme scheme
and
just write
for expression
for emotion
for you
for you
[for me]

[i write for me
let that be what it will be]

July 3, 2023

i have so much more i want to say
but my brain won’t focus itself in a way
that i can parse through
what i’ve said yet
and not

so i suppose i’ll wait until tomorrow
(or maybe just until this day
is through)

and try again.

June 20, 2023

stuck behind a computer keyboard
when i simply wish i could hook up some sort of cord
to my brain and let it leak poetry
more real/raw/strange/
honesty
might not consistently be
but it’s consistently
me

June 16, 2023

do you ever feel like
you just want to slough off your old skin
your old life
your old entire being
and start anew
in a new body
with a new brain
in a new situation
perhaps a whole new universe/
dimension/
something/
anything
i just feel
antsy
in this life
sometimes
(maybe that’s why
i am drawn towards
acting
reading
writing
the things we do
to imagine whole other lives
anew)

June 3, 2023

if only i could put all my hobbies
and helpfuls
into one basket of poetry—
the focus that comes from embroidery,
the loss of time and self
and feeling of fullness of art
of acting,
the power
and grace
of pulling one’s own body weight
up to an aerial apparatus
and seeing the whole room
spin
just this side of uncontrollably
around me,
and the expression
of my deepest most inner
mind
in a single poem
(or two)
(or three)

this is how you get to know me.

June 1, 2023

falling asleep
writing music in my mind
what a perfect metaphor
what an inspirational line
the rhyme scheme, incomparable
the tune passionate, flawless,
and i promise to remember it
when my eyes open
once more.

what was it again?

…lost it.