just let me write,
brain,
send the right brain in to do its job
leave me left alone, left brain,
except for executive functioning i need
to continue on my path to please
what little remains of the dopamine
in my internal system
so i can be a writer
so i can write as i want to write
i can do it,
i can write it,
right?
writing
January 11, 2024
letting a poem end
where it wants to end,
though you have so many postscripts and parentheticals to add/
explanation and context a reader may need/
something a little extra so you’re not misunderstood/
but letting a poem end
and stand
where it wants to let be
and let free
is a thing of bravery —
i’m learning
i’m learning
January 8, 2024
jazzy morning
until i get my head on straight
until i can see the light come in
through the window
onto my screen
into my eyes
and i can be fully awake
for this day
coming by
December 27, 2023
maybe a modicum of gibberish will help this morning poem come to fruition
a conglomeration of vocabulary i may or may not know the actual definition of
a plethora of words, used correctly or incorrectly
a whole ass menagerie of meaningless syllables somehow bringing meaning to something
in this morning poetry tradition
December 15, 2023
sometimes
sometimes
sometimes
i want the
aesthetic /
the vibe
of writing
pen and paper /
ink and quill /
notebook
and brain
and nothing
else, but
oftentimes
that is just
too much /
too hassle /
too out of my
abilities in
this world,
so i simply
vibe and vibe
and write
and write and
create in the
best way i
can — laptop
and fingers
and my brain
that simply
will not quit.
December 6, 2023
writing and composing
and creating in my mind,
but the connection to getting things
out into the world
is a broken synapse/
a mis-connected wire/
something that somehow doesn’t work
the way i think it should
[the way it does work for so many]
and i feel
closer to fixing it/
finding the connection/
actually getting my feelings
out
than i have ever felt in my life
[crazy what one honest therapy session can do]
November 30, 2023
i may have shot myself in the foot/
given myself a crazy amount of work to do
on this one, singular, last day of
National Novel Writing Month
but i also know i can do it —
it’ll be tough, but it’ll be achievable.
it’ll be hard
but i’m pretty damn sure
i can do it.
i easily made 3,000 words work
in one day of writing —
just two sections
and a break in-between,
so i’ll just have to do three sections
two breaks,
or more and more
if the work needs to be divided
into tinier bite-sizes
the only worry i have
is the focus
to be split
among writing
auditioning (i.e. memorizing/practicing)
and circus-ing
perhaps i’ll have to write
non-poetry
on the train
for the first time
ever…
November 13, 2023
meandering thinking
writing
reprocessing my brain-wiring
into something maybe more conducive
to living life
calmly
patiently
happily
[if i can dream]
November 12, 2023
most days i’m at least
a little
excited to write
something
but this morning
damn near
nothing
makes me want to go
the way i normally go
[i’ve been shopping for unnecessary new clothes
as if i can change my entire life
by dressing like
someone new]
November 11, 2023
my fear
is so loud
that i’ll write about something
i don’t understand
and offend
or embarrass
[others/myself in that order]
and rather than trying
and learning
i hide
and hide harder
and hide longer
and hide farther into myself
just wanting
wanting
wanting
to write
but never doing any of it in sight.
kipventures 