July 21, 2020

last night there was a cockroach
poking its feelers out from it’s rooftop hideaway
and at night it caught me by the creeps

but today in the
afternoon brightness
complete with my coffee and sun hat
i’m not quite as creeped

and maybe that’s the lesson for today:
the despair from yesterday
can turn to creativity today
which maybe someday could develop into
flow[tomorrow]

May 21 (part 2)

am i too hard on the Spanish?

yes they imperialized
and destroyed
and killed

but there’s less hiding of that past here.

i am used to the good old U S of A
where we pretend we’ve always been here

where we forced the natives of the land
to flat, remote distances
gave them shitty reserves
(and alcoholism)
as gifts for surviving a death march

where white people can pretend we aren’t on stolen land
because we never see the people we stole it from

but there are people throughout Peru
still speaking their language
(and oftentimes Spanish as well)
dressed as their ancestors dressed
living as their ancestors did.

the main attractions for tourism
are the Inca’s clues

i’m wary of European conquerors

because my ancestors either were them
or directly benefitted from them.

is it fair for me
to
blame the Spanish
for
the shame i hold in my heart?

(but they did imperialize
and destroy
and kill…
)