i honestly
don’t understand
me
i honestly
don’t understand
me
when one smacks a mosquito
good and full against
an arm or a leg or a wall or a table
there often remains
a dusty shadow of the mosquito
as if to say
“here is the evidence that you’ve taken a life,
now deal with it.”
am i,
for the first time in my
entire
entire
life,
looking forward to the
cooler weather
?
abeckoning
abaiting
awaiting an answer
and trying to force it
out
i feel
as though
i haven’t had a regular morning
in days [true]
weeks [kinda accurate]
months [i guess one could argue this]
years [i think this is where we lose our debate]
[though, i suppose, everything post-2020 hasn’t been
regular life/mornings/any time of day
at all]
do it
do it scared
but still
do it
[the mantra in the back of my mind
all the damn
time]
if i write of the sunlight
the sounds outside
the playlist and the air outright
is that disingenuous to myself?
playing with form
[but maybe not
function] in order
to make my poetry
function as more
than just words
on a [digital] page
who is a little little pup
who’s gonna eat her breakfast up
to become a big strong dog
it’s Computer; gonna eat it all!
sleepwalking
and daydreaming
and just kind of floating my way
through the haze around me
it’s the only way
i can see
to protect myself and everything close to me