July 31, 2026

the nose feels the cold first
breathing in the chill air
where it warms in my lungs
huddled up with my other
bodily organs, tucked and blanketed
by sinew and blood and skin and
pajamas and sheets and blankets
even the near inch of hair on my head
is enough to protect the skull from feeling
the crispness of the air, and the cheeks flushed
half tucked in a pillow, hands huddled underneath,
but the nose is the most exposed
and it tells the rest of the body how it will feel in
a few minutes when we finally
face the reality of
the outside of the bed

and it tells us
be prepared
to feel as close to frozen
as one can in the summer
in a barn in
pennsylvania

July 20, 2026

the immediate is often a good way to start

the senses:

i see — this blank page in front of me, but like most digital
formats, i’ve kept it in dark mode, so it doesn’t really feel like
a blank piece of paper, white and crisp and clean, it feels like
every other dark digital adventure in my life right now

i hear — the fan above me, well, i believe i hear the motor
turning it, not so much the fan itself, though the fan does
blow the air into my ears, and i cannot tell if that’s a hear or
a feel sense, because they get mixed up somewhere in my
brain, but also i hear cars outside every so often, and my
kip placing their mug of tea back on the table after taking
a sip

i feel — also the fan, it’s blowing its air so hard that i’m
gathering goosebumps along my arms as i write, thinking
to myself ‘maybe i should have kept that flannel on, or
brought down a cardigan, or a hoodie…’ why am i such a
freezebaby? it’s summer, it’s the time to wear shorts and
tank tops and always feel overheated and sweaty, i’m
simply cold and sweaty, like the rest of the year…

i smell — the coffee i just made for myself, blackberry cobbler
coffee, wafting in through the kitchen and through my own mug,
mixing in with the scents of this house i am now nose-blind to,
until i leave for a bit, then i come back inside, and there are those
smells, the smells of wood and kips and one dog one cat and
something else that i only associate with this house…they’re all
there in the mix as well

i taste — that same coffee, sipping every few minutes, sipping when
i’m at a loss for what to write and need a moment to find my
bearings, sipping when i feel the placebo effect from the last sip
fading, and need to remind my neurons that i’m caffeinated, even
though i know the caffeine really doesn’t affect me that much; it’s
all association with taste, and honestly, i kind of like it that way

i wrote of the immediate
i wrote three hundred plus words in this poem alone
is this enough of a warm-up for writing?
is this something i’d want to actually post?
is this enough of a warm-up for life and living?

i think so

i think so

i think so

June 10, 2026

no sleep
no life outside of theatre
breaking out all over my face
insomnia
all day every day inside a dark black box
sitting
then running around
then sitting again
no lights then bright lights
quiet
and too much sound
the senses are jarred awake
in jarring
but lovely ways

i still don’t know who i am half the time
nor how i fit in to society/how others perceive me
but at least i generally feel at home in the theatre

[even with everything it brings
damn
do i feel at home in a theatre]

July 6, 2024

Three Musings on Summer Thunderstorms:

the sky darkens to post-sunset dusky grey
and a lightning bolt passes by my window
the rumble of thunder
the stream of rain
and this summer storm is at it again

[i love this weather]

~~~

thunderstorms make me smile
interrupting the daily toil
of sunrise and shine and set and night
darkening a summer morning
or lightning-flash-brightening
midnight pitch black,
sounds escaping our atmosphere —
booms and cracks and the smacks of hard raindrops
cleansing the air
feeding the ground
offering greener hues when the showers subside
and summertime just isn’t summer
without

~~~

drench me in rain
fill my ears with thunderclaps
and my eyes with bright bolts of lightning

let me taste a summer storm
and offer my nose the delightful scent
of petrichor

as the pressure changes
and my heart grows
and i know
i’m present and whole.