February 5, 2025

this poem will
[likely]
take the place of the poem that was supposed to go
on my silly poetry blog
yesterday

and though i am not writing it
on the date it says at the top
it is still a poem i am posting here
[and i did, technically, write poetry yesterday
just not quite enough
and nothing i felt was
whole
enough
to post]

and what did i do yesterday
that prevented me from writing
all 300 of my poetry words
and taking the time to post
my silly blog post writings?

i had conversations
with my kip
the love of my life
as we enjoyed a distraction from
morning everyday routines
and the terror that is happening everywhere
while we dealt with the terror of
bodies
not cooperating
and puppies
asking to play
[that one’s not a terror though,
that one there is
absolutely delightful]
and just had a bit of a reset
with communication
and a bagel
and a fig bar

so that’s what i did yesterday…

what will happen today?

March 6, 2023

the problem with leaving
with vacationing
with taking a [much needed] break
is that your whole world
continues on
without you

i want a break
where i can rest up
relax
absolve my mind of all the thinking it does
calm my brain/body/soul until it’s reset
and pick back up from where i left off

but people still exist even when you aren’t around to see them
and systems still continue on in perpetuity
and seasons/entropy/growing/dying/
everything keeps going
even when you are
on your little
break

i just want time to stop
i just want a pause
or a reset button
or rewind
or something
to help my brain understand
what happened over the last 27+ years of my life
because the way i’m going right now
there’s no reason or rhyme or
timing that makes any
sense

and so i keep going
i do not rest
because i know any break i get
won’t actually do
what i need it to
so i keep going
and keep going
and keep going
and that can’t be very healthy

[but i see no other way]