May 6, 2026

as i write
and write and write
throughout my life
i wonder what it’s all about
who it’s all for

if it’s all for me, that seems
statistically
a little daft

for there are billions of
people on this planet of ours
and even more that have come before
and will join us
after we are all
gone

so to write for only one life
that feels
foolish

but again, the human condition is such that
writing truly and honestly
for yourself
often makes happenstance happen
and many many others
see themselves in your
words

so to write for others
in a way that makes others feel seen
you need not think of the others
[you must not think of the others]
else the writing comes off as
cliche
or trying to hard
or pandering to an audience

i can’t stop myself from thinking of an audience
even as i write these morning poems
daily
daily
daily
that i doubt even i could ever get through
on a re-read

i can’t help but wonder
if someone will love reading my words
with as much care and mild obsession
as i took writing them

[or is that not true — i’m not really careful
or obsessing
as i write these
every
single
morning — i’m flinging them
stanza by stanza
out into the ether
and hoping they catch the eye
of someone
who needs them]

February 27, 2025

caught up in a book
in a way i haven’t been for a while
[at least not a physical book — we all know
how i feel about the locked tomb series in audiobook form]
but caught up in a way that
i can’t wait for my next subway ride
in a way that
i brought it upstairs before bed
and read
instead of dicking around on my phone
in a way that
i’m probably having nightmares about it
[it’s not that fun of a book,
but boy is it
engaging
like crazy]

April 20, 2023

planning and preparing
are nothing when it comes to
insurance
human fallibility
and the twists of the fates

~~~

i use squiggles
[tildes]
to break the momentum
from one poem
to the next

but only in a batch of three
because formatting in devices these days
is far too variable
for a whole line

so i rely on my
three
little
squiggles
to [hopefully] signify
to both reader and writer
that this poem is over–
re-ready yourself
for a whole new
poem
beginning.

~~~

lost in the depths of a book
so visceral
so immersive
so taking-me-along-for-the-ride
i can’t decide
if this one is more stressful than the first
but all of these ninths
give me some sort of curse
of caring
and staring
long distances as i listen to them
audiobooks carrying me through the star-system
the big house
the river
and i just want to know
what happens next
what happens next
what happens next???

February 8, 2022

listen
to the same song
6, 8, 10 times in a row
memorize the words
memorize the favorite moments
(the parts of the song that make your brain go
‘brr’
)
and still adore it
listen to it some more the next day
and the next
and the next
until you know it like the back of your hand,
you could write essays, diatribes, theses about the song
and then wonder why it is
certain songs
bring up
certain time periods of your life
so viscerally