writing
trying to outpace
the time it takes
to run down my laptop battery
and
the arrival of our breakfast day
a little adrenaline
to start
today
mundane
March 10, 2025
i wish i saw through poet’s eyes
the beauty of the earth at all times —
but instead i see the pain and despair
and try to beautify that
with impassioned speeches/
or try to find the tiniest spec
of lovely
in a day full of pain/
and make the mundane
beautiful again
though it doesn’t really feel like
poetry
to me
without grand sunsets
or allegories of bees and flowers,
i’m over here trying —
making beauty out of angst
and bubble gum
January 14, 2025
so
i woke up at 4:45
and played the game of
“what will put me back to sleep”
because my brain was too awake with
anxiety
so i learned some french
and sign language
and cuddled my kip and my puppy
and stared at a crossword puzzle
and the internet
and even tried
just breathing
but
by 5:35
i was still in my too-awake-era
and kip wanted to get up anyway
so we both placed some clothes on our bodies
and i bundled up with the dog on a walk
and fed both animals
and sat down to write
and now it’s just past 6:30 am
and it feels strange to stare at the outside
pitch black
and think about how i’ve been awake already
for almost two hours
but i suppose that’s what happens
when stress brain just won’t
turn
off
December 14, 2024
perched
like a gremlin
atop the specialty cushion that is
supposed to
help my back/glute issues,
but only if i sit on it
like a normal human
no wonder i never fully
rid myself of my aches
and pains
December 3, 2024
the experience
of hating wearing glasses so much
that every time they smudge
or get dirty
you refuse to take them off and clean them
because then
you would be giving in to the idea
that you’ll wear them
for more time
in the day
and you don’t want to give the concept of “glasses”
that satisfaction
[as foolish and ridiculous
as you know that sounds/is]
so then
days go by
and you simply tilt your head
this way
and that
to get around
each splot of smudge
and speckle of dirt
and the glasses themselves
are made up of mostly grime by this time
but
still
cleaning them
would indicate
intention
and you don’t intend
to wear your glasses
much
anyway
April 4, 2024
there is something
~tragic~
about terrible gum
especially in one’s
favorite
flavor:
the excitement
for the bright blue
of ultra-sour
blueberry
the curly-q
of a whole big tape
of bubble gum
waiting in front of you
and to have the initial unfurl
of the roll
snap
and break
and shatter
only bodes ominous
for the rest of the experience
and then
for the flavor to be good
for maybe four seconds
just makes the loss of flavor
later
hurt one’s soul
a million times over
and if that weren’t enough
right when you think you should just
spit it out
be done with it,
a random flavor pocket will burst to life
and you want to chew more
to not waste any flavor,
but the chewing hurts your jaw
and the flavoring is overall
so underwhelming
this disappointment
is one of the worst
of my life
[not really, but man,
when you are *in the mood* for some
blueberry bubble gum
and this happens…
the soul aches
for brand-name hubba bubba
bubble tape]
January 18, 2024
something
shifted
in the pain in my shoulder
instead of feeling
impossibly impinged
it just feels sore
tight
like a normal shoulder might
and though i still stand slightly lopsided
and i still feel everything ~off~ inside my shoulder joint
i’m hopeful this means
*something*
in this journey
December 17, 2023
Buzz Buzz
bzbz
the vibration changes
when each alert
differentiates
BUZZbuzz BUZZbuzz
bzt
BUZZ BzzbzbzBzzbzbz BUZZ Bzzbz
Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz Bzzzzzzzzzzzz
i hope this helps
someone
anyone
October 27, 2023
coffee-filled condensation
drips from the tentacle
of my one-of-a-kind
hand-made
oversized
coffee
mug
and i try to rescue it
bringing as much of the drop as i can
from side
to finger
to mouth
but there’s still condensation
from cold fridge
to warm house
dichotomies
exchanging
vibes
and i’m glad i don’t have to worry about coasters for this table
much
October 2, 2023
the dying sinuses
of the colder weather
last week
the residual sinus headache
as the weather warms once more
this week
i am no longer a human person,
i am simply a conglomeration
of inflamed nasal passages
affected by temperature
kipventures 