i feel
as though
i haven’t had a regular morning
in days [true]
weeks [kinda accurate]
months [i guess one could argue this]
years [i think this is where we lose our debate]
[though, i suppose, everything post-2020 hasn’t been
regular life/mornings/any time of day
at all]
morning poetry
September 16, 2025
if i write of the sunlight
the sounds outside
the playlist and the air outright
is that disingenuous to myself?
August 1, 2025
i often forget
that the sounds of the birds
can be my morning page music
and the crickets and wind and rain
can replace my podcasts
i no longer use perpetual sound
to block out my own inner voice
[that sounds like some kind of growth]
but i think i have now found myself using any auditory distractions
as literal distractions
from boredom
and i do wish i was more on board
being bored
for creativity’s sake
April 28, 2025
i don’t actually know what it means
to be
a great writer
a great poet
i’m just sitting here
at my messy dinner table
early in the morning
writing whatever comes to mind
as a way to encourage myself
to deal with the day
that is coming towards me
at breakneck speed
maybe,
when you’re in your ‘fighting a [seemingly] losing war
against fascism with the best tool you have —
kindness’ era
you’ll understand
~~~
i feel like this kind of morning
and this kind of writing
is the reason i started this challenge to begin with
i feel more awake
more aware
more ready to start my day
though i still need to edit and pick and send in the audition
i feel so much more prepared for it
now
~~~
“you look like such a writer!”
of my big sweater
comfy tee
glasses
bun
and coffee in hand
and i do, don’t i?
i do…
April 26, 2025
not really feeling
the writing right now
but i know i should
and i gotta
and i will and i am and i have been
and i did
April 18, 2025
just
rocking out
to some ratatat
[instead of writing
these morning pages
like i should be
like i should be]
April 8, 2025
finish up these pages
so the bagel can be eaten
so the laundry can be started
so the nap can be taken
so the cat meds can be obtained
so the lyra can be flown on
so the massage can be gotten
and so i can come back home
and be lonely
but not alone
[because these sweet animals
are my greatest buddies
besides my spouse]
April 7, 2025
i’m writing so much
but i have so little to show for it
for it’s all poem-to-do-lists
and commentary on previous writing
and ideas for future writing
and i would like to stick to today
from this moment on, okay?
March 25, 2025
in photography, i have no problem
taking tens
of hundreds
of thousands of photos
knowing that somewhere in there,
there will be a great picture —
gorgeous
experimental
framed well
captured beautifully
and composition, exquisite
and even in poetry, mornings of multitudes,
all my poems
multiple
every morning, i know
not every poem will be great
but somewhere in here
there may be something
to write home about
then why oh why do i shy away from
the writing of prose/novels/
or plays?
as if i need my first try to be
so great
otherwise i should just
give
up
?
is it simply that it takes so much longer to write
longer form, than it does to slap dash down a poem
or capture a second or few
in a non-moving image?
so the effort to output
ratio feels more
[risky]
[or am i so scared of something more/or less scary?]
March 14, 2025
so much happened yesterday
and i
didn’t even poem about it
[yet]
~~~
{trigger warning: suicidal ideation, mention of eating disorders}
my overanalytic brain
that runs through every possibility
that made a whole “pro & con” list
on which eating disorder
to give myself
is probably the same thing
that has saved me
from actually killing myself
every time i’ve gotten close
in these
ideations
~~~
distracted
and distractable
and not what i wanted
from my day at home
preparing to do things
i should be doing
should have done
days
weeks
months
ago
but am i just going to
nap
again
until it’s time to leave
again?
again?
again?
kipventures 