to delve back into
a former
self
i suppose i should use
and utilize
what i’m most afraid
of:
music being my strongest sense memory

i realize
that half the time
it is simply a chord or sustained note
that reminds me of a certain time
or place
or thought
or memory
but i also know certain songs
that hold those memories captive
like iron bubbles
i can see through
but they’re blurry
and i can’t seem to penetrate
unless i go fully inside
the song

so
i think i should
but i also think
i should do it
meditatively
with parameters
to hold the memories
and songs
in high esteem
treat them with reverence
and not abuse this power i’ve been granted
(nor rely on it too much
because i’m making new memories every day)

and what are the chances
that a song i listened to
a ton
in 2007/2008/2009
would show up through a randomizer in a little green app
[the visual memories aren’t yet here,
but boy is the emotional kerfuffle
strong
with this song…]

(what a ride that was)