dreams

September 2, 2026

/ HJ / Leave a comment

strange dreams about
abandoned houses connected to ours
about
strangers and mta drivers trying to make
a better plan for other folks in the area
about
kip trying to protect me from certain things
and then acting like me when faced with
other things
about
observing and assessing and waiting to make conclusions
about getting out of places quickly
and about
my father
just hanging out

all somehow connected
and completely disconnected
kind of like the two buildings being dreamed about

oh, and also about
nature
reclaiming
in beautiful ways

September 1, 2026

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raise your hand if you’re a grand schemer
who grew up with parents who supported
and encouraged your ideas, and had plans
of their own that you saw never come to
pass because of some combination of time
and effort and sickness and death and now
even though you still have such lofty goals
you know deep inside you that you’ll never
ever ever achieve them because your whole
life is predicated on the fact that plans
never
actually go through and get done to the
endings as wanted and though you still
try to start things you are aware that the
learned patterns and subconscious trauma
makes it almost impossible for you to
see anything through at all ever in your life

or is that just me?

April 23, 2026

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the brain can’t seem to parse
what words are words
and what words are not
this dawning morning

confusing dreams keep shifting by
like memories i’d
forgotten, like
the sands of time making imagery
in a jar

if i nap
and sleep
and dream
again
will that put me right
or go further into
wrong-ness territory?

[only one way to test and tell]

December 29, 2025

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how high would you fly
knowing you must, eventually, fall?

could you resist the sirens’ call
convincing your flawed human brain
you might just resist it all?

could you throw yourself, knowingly, into the sky
just to see what the view is like up there
just to prove yourself mighty
for a moment?

or could you stay down on the ground
safe
but knowing you’d never know what the clouds taste like?

December 13, 2025

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the problem with having dreams
about places and people you haven’t seen
in some time, is that they all tend to
mesh
and merge
together, becoming one big amalgamation of
The Past™
or This Point In My Life™
or Anyone And Anything I Haven’t Thought Of In A While™

and though i appreciate
that my brain is constantly churning
even at night
and never lets anything
go,
i do wish the memories were
clearer,
so i could actually contact
whoever my subconscious
is missing
at any given point
and actually reach out to them
and say
hello

September 19, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

waking moments
still stuck in dreams
trying to keep track of
what is reality
and what might not be

and what makes sense to me
is that there is not any one solid answer

it’s all just chemical reactions and brain synapses
trying to make sense of a world that just
doesn’t

August 23, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

waking up from a wild dream
with ideas for a story
but honestly, once fully awake,
there are far more questions about this concept
than an initial start to writing

but i suppose i’ll just have to see
what it may become
eventually

by writing it

April 29, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

my mind is stuck in the dream i had
where all i can remember is the concept
and the feeling
but i have no words to describe it
except
possibility
and hope
and space exploration
[and maybe cryogenic stasis?]
but it felt a lot like apartments of today
except
it was on a space station?
[or would be
in a minute]
and we were trying
we were giving it a chance
we were hoping
we were giving the concept of hope
a chance
in our hearts
and lives
and i don’t know why
that hits so hard
in this year 2025
but it does
it does

December 25, 2024

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christmas eve dreams
of arson with three sisters and me
to make a new life for ourselves
outside of the oppressive home
but loving our family enough
to have failsafes in place
just in case
just in case

but the strangest part of the dream
wasn’t the reasoning,
or the 1800’s garb against
1900’s cityscape buildings,
or even the minute details of the
arson
itself —
it was the fact that the next day
we had to do it all again, the house
magically un-burned
everyone’s memories erased
except for ours
except for ours
[and why did it go so much worse
the second time around?]