dreams

December 13, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

the problem with having dreams
about places and people you haven’t seen
in some time, is that they all tend to
mesh
and merge
together, becoming one big amalgamation of
The Past™
or This Point In My Life™
or Anyone And Anything I Haven’t Thought Of In A While™

and though i appreciate
that my brain is constantly churning
even at night
and never lets anything
go,
i do wish the memories were
clearer,
so i could actually contact
whoever my subconscious
is missing
at any given point
and actually reach out to them
and say
hello

September 19, 2025

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waking moments
still stuck in dreams
trying to keep track of
what is reality
and what might not be

and what makes sense to me
is that there is not any one solid answer

it’s all just chemical reactions and brain synapses
trying to make sense of a world that just
doesn’t

August 23, 2025

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waking up from a wild dream
with ideas for a story
but honestly, once fully awake,
there are far more questions about this concept
than an initial start to writing

but i suppose i’ll just have to see
what it may become
eventually

by writing it

April 29, 2025

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my mind is stuck in the dream i had
where all i can remember is the concept
and the feeling
but i have no words to describe it
except
possibility
and hope
and space exploration
[and maybe cryogenic stasis?]
but it felt a lot like apartments of today
except
it was on a space station?
[or would be
in a minute]
and we were trying
we were giving it a chance
we were hoping
we were giving the concept of hope
a chance
in our hearts
and lives
and i don’t know why
that hits so hard
in this year 2025
but it does
it does

December 25, 2024

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christmas eve dreams
of arson with three sisters and me
to make a new life for ourselves
outside of the oppressive home
but loving our family enough
to have failsafes in place
just in case
just in case

but the strangest part of the dream
wasn’t the reasoning,
or the 1800’s garb against
1900’s cityscape buildings,
or even the minute details of the
arson
itself —
it was the fact that the next day
we had to do it all again, the house
magically un-burned
everyone’s memories erased
except for ours
except for ours
[and why did it go so much worse
the second time around?]

February 29, 2024

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a first leap day
of this poetry project
and i’m still stuck in my head
in processing a dream i had
about churches on roller coaster tracks
and fast fast carousel spins of UU congregations
for the purpose of awareness
for the purpose of social change
for saying Nex Benedict’s name
and never again
never again
never again

November 14, 2023

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i am living in dreams
this morning:

asking my Grandmama all the questions i thought of
at her memorial;
snuggling with my Mom, refusing to question why
her dying would be a test
that i passed
after six months of her gone;
exploring a Gaza un-riddled with holes;
and persuading governments
Not
to fund a genocide.

these are my
wildest imaginings in sleep.