breathe through
the pain
the panic
the day
the week
the month
the year
the administration
the takeover
the ugliness
the inhumanity
the world
the lifetime
[a life is meant to be lived
fully, not
breathed
through
until the end]
[if only those who made it this bad
did any meditation
of self-reflection
of their own damn actions]
the apprehension
the tension
the aches and pains of
just sitting
sitting
sitting
forever
[what other horrors does a 9-5 bring?]
the pain in my arm
has never harmed me
in the air
this bothersome little
strain
on the tendon
is only ever annoying
when writing
or scrolling
or holding
or driving
it never affects me while flying
which is nice
but
it does make me think that
my bod just wants to be a circus performer
and nothing else
nothing
“normal”
at least
the sharp pain behind my knee
reminding me that my body is fallible
in the most silly of ways
perched
like a gremlin
atop the specialty cushion that is
supposed to
help my back/glute issues,
but only if i sit on it
like a normal human
no wonder i never fully
rid myself of my aches
and pains
my massage therapist’s fingers
find space between my ribs
where before there was resistance
and knots
and no way of going through
and she breathes a sigh of relief
as my body returns to
what it should be
rather than holding all the stress
of the whole world
in my muscles
and knotting up the nerves along with it
and i walk away refreshed
but also, of course, worried —
how long will it take for my body to collapse back
to the shape it’s been in
for nearly a month now?
and will pain ever be a thing
i am
without?
kipventures 