January 30, 2023

when i write
i write at a table
but i don’t use the table
(except to hold my morning coffee)
i slide down in my chair
and lift my legs to the other across
and lay my laptop across my lap
cross one foot over the other
and write until my legs or butt falls asleep
or until my terrible posture hurts my back
or until my arms start to get sore
from low-key holding my laptop on my criss-crossed lap
and somehow this works for me
though i can’t help but imagine
a me
where i sit properly
feet fully reaching the floor
posture great
writing without pain sneaking its way in
and wonder if
i’d write
better
longer
if i sat like
a regular person

~~~

the cat gallops upstairs
chasing invisible ghosts
and singing the song of her kin
and at least she can amuse herself like this
for hours on end
while we break our evening’s fast with coffee and poetry and song
the cat’s harmony never quite fitting with whatever we play
but that’s why we love it (and her) so

~~~

i would like to write a letter to my grandmama some time today
because she constantly writes me lovely greetings
‘how are you’s’ and ‘here’s been my day’
and i love them so much.
and i’ve told her,
but i know the reciprocal is just as loved as the appreciation
and she literally said she wonders how we’re doing
so i suppose that’s what is on my agenda
(other than circus)
today

January 1, 2023

you’d think the cat,
being feline,
would attack the yarn
as it lay
open season
atop the lap tops–
but no
it was the crochet hook
waiting next to the yarn ball
parallel to the open end
that this hassle decided
was the appropriate cat toy
for this evening.

oh, and now it’s the apple pencil…

but why, cat, why?

September 8, 2022

the puppy
and the cat
are not mortal enemies

they may, in fact
simply be
frenemies

(though,
perhaps
that’s all from the cat’s
perspective

the puppy
100% believes
they’re besties

or at least could/should be.)

August 31, 2022

sleepy puppies
and writing spouses
sneaky cats
and work on houses
long-ass days
and even longer nights
when there is no internet to help
with career or comfort plights

a twenty-first century struggle bus

~~~

how is it that
when i skip one day of writing
i feel like i’ve lost
every fibre of creativity
and every ounce of self-discipline
and every last little thing i learned
over the past near year and a half?

~~~

one more poem
one more rhyme
simply to get myself
better in my mind
to see the time
and time again roll
to see myself
as i always wanted to be
and to finally see me
as i was meant to be
futuristically
and fully

June 5, 2022

we’ve repurposed a large tupperware container
into where we put all the pieces of paper
and threads of former toys
computer has ripped through
with her sharp puppy teeth
and we call it her art collection
and i love it

we also have
two of her puppy teeth,
molars that fell
outside
rather than down the throat,
and we’re thinking of putting them
in her art jar as well
because she did make them
and they are
art

~~~

the puppy has learned
that the top of the soft crate
can help her see
over the room-fence-divider,
and also
can keep her cool
on hot summer days

(now to see how long
the zippered canvas
will hold her weight
as she grows…)

~~~

Louka
was cat-like
in the way that she was
not very dog-like

Computer
is very cat-like
in many mannerisms
and play-approaches
and active qualities

(the passive
and the active
cat-like qualities)

(meanwhile our cat
is more monkey
than any other creature,
so…)

May 29, 2022

sometimes, you need the break,
and sometimes the break needs you,
and every now and then
you need each other,
and that
is a beautiful day

(if you listen)

~~~

what is it about the stardew valley
wintertime
music
that feels so sad
and desolate
and cold
and hopeful
and magical
and pleasant
and soft
and exciting
and new
every time i listen?
every time i play?

~~~

puppy whines
cat hisses
communication:
solid misses

May 23, 2022

what is it about
lying next to a cat
that lulls me to sleep
faster
than just forcing myself to bed?

~~~

at least
being in my childhood bedroom
and gazing upon my
most-loved books
has reminded me that
it’s not just in adulthood
that i’ve found comfort in the
already known storyline
and re-consuming media
over and over and over again

(certain copies
of certain books
can attest to the fact that
i consumed them
over
and over
and over again
before i even hit puberty)

~~~

the internet
in this house
is struggling
almost as much as my sinuses
are fighting
to do their job well

(could the dust be blocking the wifi
like it’s blocking my nose???)