my muscle-system contracts
and aches
and doesn’t quite pulse with pain
but it’s getting close
and there are no cramps
but damn
i might prefer such a thing
because at least a cramp can go away
and this tendon trouble
or maybe it’s muscle
i have no idea
but it stays
and stays
and sticks around
and i want to know what’s actually good for it — rest?
recovery?
light exercise?
heavy?
more reps?
less with larger weights?
what will help my body feel like
it’s actually working together
instead of against itself
all the damn time???
body parts
March 5, 2026
my body feels like it is
about to fall completely
apart
and i simply hope it stays together
for one [or two] more circus lessons
and an evening voiceover class
after all that
it is welcome to
fail
because friday is the day
i have a two hour massage booked
and hopefully
hopefully
hopefully
that can put me back together again
[or at least break my body apart
in such a way
that fitting myself back
goes the right
way]
September 8, 2025
do other people’s bones
just kinda pop
and shift
into place
when their bodies move,
like they’re catching up
with the muscles and tendons and fat and signals
from the brain — the bones are lazing their days away
but are [eventually] taken along for the ride?
is that my whole issue? that literally none of my body parts move as one
unit?
i’m just body parts
and systems
and cells and bacteria and all the tiny things
all wrapped up into one trench-coat of an external “body”
[maybe that’s why they/them feels so good on me]
kipventures 