artist retreat

August 6, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

still on the high from the retreat

trying to connect with my own creative vibe
outside of all the wonderful folks
i got to know
over three long/short days

i think [my] lesson of the retreat is:
everyone has such different methods of storytelling
and modes of writing
and even within one person there are
worlds and citizens and characters and genres
and everyone listening is so, so supportive

i think i may be able to bring something
next year

[better start writing/planning
now!]

[and that is the first time that has felt exciting
and daunting
rather than daunting and a laborious struggle]

August 4, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

perhaps

in order to avoid the trappings
of first-time writings

[the “mary sue” the self-insertion
the romanticized tragedy
the not-flawed-enough protagonists
and too-flawed antagonists
and cursorily researched science
and all things i’d judge or freeze stagnant
when viewing in my own writing]

i simply need to go after them,
on purpose even,

and indulge.

August 2, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

how quickly we get used to things —
lack of sleep
un-flavored coffee
living in the woods
being around people

and how quickly we end up missing it
when, inevitably, events end

what i’m trying to say is
i miss this retreat
already

August 1, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

i often forget
that the sounds of the birds
can be my morning page music
and the crickets and wind and rain
can replace my podcasts

i no longer use perpetual sound
to block out my own inner voice

[that sounds like some kind of growth]

but i think i have now found myself using any auditory distractions
as literal distractions
from boredom

and i do wish i was more on board
being bored
for creativity’s sake

July 31, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

there’s something i know about myself
that others may not

it’s that i can always find a bright side
as long as i’m sharing the story with
someone else

got lost on a path i didn’t know well?
i got the opportunity to see bunnies and deer and one cat and two horses
and enjoy nature in a way i haven’t since
i grew up in middle of nowhere ohio

stumbled upon some uneven ground?
i am reminding myself of my rural roots
clambering over rocks and holes and
hopefully not twisting my ankle
like when i was an awkward teen

didn’t sleep well the first night of a retreat?
honestly, i’m getting back to my roots once more
adolescence
and early adulthood
and never sleeping more than an hour at a time
and waking up to see what’s happening online
[just as slow then as my service is here]

and while my younger years were not a piece of cake
by any means
and i wouldn’t want to relive them fully

getting the opportunity to rehash them with a
stronger body
and more calmed mind
surrounded by other artists…

kind of a quiet dream.