actor's life

June 29, 2025

/ HJ / Leave a comment

perhaps my desire is to educate
perhaps my destiny is to entertain
perhaps i just need to make folks aware
that the issues seen here and there
are systemic
systematic
and sometimes
on purpose

because the problem with conspiracy theories
is that there is a fine, fine line
between a theory about something crazy
and a retelling of something
that has actually happened
to a non-white person
in the past
[and, honestly, today]

February 4, 2023

/ HJ / Leave a comment

acting
theatre
the arts

they are art
but they are also my job

and so i view them as such
otherwise
i get too overwhelmed
i get too anxious over everything

so if i treat them as a career
a necessity
an activity i’ve done so much i could probably do it in my sleep
they don’t hold power over me

and then i can do them

better

December 3, 2022

/ HJ / Leave a comment

what a weird week
said multiple people these past seven days
not necessarily bad
(nor good either)
just
weird.

and i have to agree;
going from being terrified to submit to anything,
theatre/
film/
voiceover/
experimental/
at all
(for fear of the inevitable
no-reply rejection)
i submitted to three things in two days
and got auditions for over half
(still have to audition,
but damn
does it feel like
the relief
of crawling out of a ravine
but looking up to see
more walls surrounding you
again)

man

i chose this.

November 13, 2022

/ HJ / Leave a comment

late night writing
(not that late)
(is it even night?)
(damn daylight savings)
(at least i am writing)

~~~

what if
i let myself
really
trust
in the universe
and let
the rest
go?

~~~

there is an adage
in auditioning
in acting in general
to ‘find the love’

in any scene
if it seems
about money
or revenge
or procedure
or humor
or anything
or nothing
something
to make it
more interesting
more alive
find
the love

in life
in living
in the universe

find
the love