February 22, 2024

half of my self
wants to run around
and have adventures
and meet only new people
and hear stories
and create more
and never ever ever stop
moving

and the other half of me is so comfortable
having a night in
television blaring
but not staring into a screen
instead cuddling up with my kip
or embroidering
or organizing bookshelves
or cleaning
just the menialest of menial tasks
feeling
so satisfied

but whenever i do one
i feel fulfilled for a bit
until i hear the other option
calling to me

and the only place i find i can fully balance out
is in sleep

when my physical self is at rest
and my imagination is bursting

[i really need to write more than poetry sometime]

February 21, 2024

is it true?
that hearts synchronize in beat beat beating rhythms
when sitting in an audience
of a performance

i agree —
i want so badly to believe —
and it probably comes from some sort of truth
[there’s that study of church vs live musical performance
and how they give the same
spiritually
significant
feeling]
and i know my heart’s emotions
synchronized with those around me:
gripping our chests
because we couldn’t reach deep
and hold our own hearts,
murmurs of agreement
of sorrow
of unthinkable pain and loss and struggles to keep humanity,
and humming catchy tunes as they remained stuck after the applause had ended,
and feeling as though the whole space —
performers
audience members
volunteers
everyone —
had hugged me and held me
as i
as we
listened to damn near unbearable story after unbearable story after unbearable story…
but we bore it,
and we were witnesses to it,
all
for the synchronization
of our
beating
hearts

February 18, 2024

question all the answers given,
and answer everything that’s asked of you
by a child —
even if your answer is
“i don’t know”
that’s better than lying
or saying “just ‘cuz it’s so”

we need more critical thinkers;
we need more people to grow and go up against
the powers that be
because the powers that be
are just being
rich

and i don’t believe that benefits
anyone
but themselves.

[and we’ve needed something new
for a long long while now]

February 17, 2024

maybe
one upon a time
i was happy
i was healed
i was a child without trauma
but now
i gotta
know it
own it
be it
and maybe work towards
getting back to the child we all
once were

[but why
can i not
think of children
without thinking of
every
single
child
killed by israel]

[i really can’t think of anything anymore
without finding a parallel
to the tragedy
in Palestine]

February 16, 2024

am i in a bad mood?
am i just trying to get down
and dirty
into the business
of morning poetry?
am i tired and sleepy and hungry and fatigued
with the terrorism happening in the middle east/
the horrors and atrocities
committed by our international “allies”
with our “support”/
and the fact that it feels like
no one
in power
is standing up to anyone at all?
[and the brainwashing is such that
some can look at lives lost
and feel nothing
nothing
nothing
at all]

February 14, 2024

it’s going to be
A Day
today,
that much i can say —

it may be a long one/
a tough one/
an exhausting one/
a weird one/
a sad one/
a silly one/
a random one/
an unexpected one/
a listless one/
but i can already tell
it is going to be
A Day.