i feel
as though
i haven’t had a regular morning
in days [true]
weeks [kinda accurate]
months [i guess one could argue this]
years [i think this is where we lose our debate]
[though, i suppose, everything post-2020 hasn’t been
regular life/mornings/any time of day
at all]
Author: HJ
September 22, 2025
when one job
one gig
one life
gets in the way of
another job/
gig/
life
it’s annoying
it’s frustrating
it’s bad but it’s not terrible
because this is what i mean[t] when i say[said]
i cannot
stay in one lane
my
entire
existence
[so i suppose
this is the price
to pay]
September 21, 2025
ok
ok
you can do it
you can write
and you can teach
and you can lead
and you can sleep
and you can highlight
and you can act
and you can audition
and you can survive
and you can thrive
and you can get through this
busy busy busy day
where there’s so much pressure
that often tears you apart
but today is the day
that it’ll just scratch you a little
but the wound will cauterize
and then scar over
and you’ll be able to do this
over and over and over
until you barely notice
the weapons you create in your own head
that
prevent you from doing
what you want to be
doing
you can do today
September 20, 2025
why
do i so often feel like
coffee is my only friend?
i have many close companions,
even more friendly acquaintances
that i’ve bared my soul to
at a moment or two,
but when left to my own tired devices
in early mornings or late late nights
with no one around
i think to myself “coffee, you’re the only one
i can turn to,
the only one
who understands
the truth of my heart
and the heart of my mind”
it’s so silly to think this way
about an inanimate
ingestible
thing
[whose main cause for being
is the caffeine, which barely affects me
so…even sillier, it seems
to pray at the altar of this
bitter black bean juice
but damn, that seems to be
my only religion
and i stand by it]
September 19, 2025
waking moments
still stuck in dreams
trying to keep track of
what is reality
and what might not be
and what makes sense to me
is that there is not any one solid answer
it’s all just chemical reactions and brain synapses
trying to make sense of a world that just
doesn’t
September 18, 2025
being
a neurodivergent individual
i often overcorrect
when someone offers me
a correction
i don’t really know how to get to a
“happy medium”
since, apparently, i can either go
full-hog
into what i’m doing wrong
or full hog
into what i think doing
right
is like
September 17, 2025
do it
do it scared
but still
do it
[the mantra in the back of my mind
all the damn
time]
September 16, 2025
if i write of the sunlight
the sounds outside
the playlist and the air outright
is that disingenuous to myself?
September 15, 2025
playing with form
[but maybe not
function] in order
to make my poetry
function as more
than just words
on a [digital] page
September 14, 2025
not feeling the morning page poetry
this morning
but that doesn’t mean
i won’t do it
i mean
i continue to do this
every
single
morning
whether i’m in the mood or not
just to have something to do
just to have a habit to latch onto
just to have some proof
to say
‘i was here, i had thoughts and feelings and insights, too’
and maybe someone will read them soon
and maybe someone will read them in hundreds of years
and maybe
because they’re all digital
they’ll disappear into the ether
but
maybe the ether will get a kick out of all these poems
and they and the void can talk about me
behind my back
when i’m long long long gone
kipventures 