July 31, 2025

there’s something i know about myself
that others may not

it’s that i can always find a bright side
as long as i’m sharing the story with
someone else

got lost on a path i didn’t know well?
i got the opportunity to see bunnies and deer and one cat and two horses
and enjoy nature in a way i haven’t since
i grew up in middle of nowhere ohio

stumbled upon some uneven ground?
i am reminding myself of my rural roots
clambering over rocks and holes and
hopefully not twisting my ankle
like when i was an awkward teen

didn’t sleep well the first night of a retreat?
honestly, i’m getting back to my roots once more
adolescence
and early adulthood
and never sleeping more than an hour at a time
and waking up to see what’s happening online
[just as slow then as my service is here]

and while my younger years were not a piece of cake
by any means
and i wouldn’t want to relive them fully

getting the opportunity to rehash them with a
stronger body
and more calmed mind
surrounded by other artists…

kind of a quiet dream.

July 30, 2025

having the resources
to act out,

but not to actually achieve
the help that you need.

having the words to express
exactly what you need,

but still no resources
that actually
help.

society has progressed
somewhat,
but not to the extent that
everyone, everyone needs/deserves/requires.

it is [is it] a viscous cycle

July 28, 2025

sharing
is caring

but sometimes sharing doesn’t come
up right away, and needs years of
establishing trust and instincts and
rapport and a shared understanding of the world

sometimes sharing
needs to come after miles and miles of other
sharing

sometimes sharing doesn’t happen until
you’ve been married nearly
ten years

July 27, 2025

why isn’t it more acceptable
to protest with
citizenship?

[i mean, i know why
logistically
but wouldn’t that be an interesting world to live in
if it was actually feasible to do so?]

July 26, 2025

that was
the greatest part of my morning

the greatest morning

a cat on my lap
enjoying the scritches
from my left hand

and a puppy at my feet
leaning into me
enjoying the scritches from my
right hand

and though i got no writing done
and it only lasted about ten minutes

i was in a blissful heaven
the whole time

July 25, 2025

calling kip’s heart palpitations
“the palpies”
has definitely made them
less wholly frightening

but now i’ve become somewhat
fond of them…

we would still like them to not happen
or at least
not be indicative of something even more frightening
than their mere conceptualization
and existence in
kip’s body

but if the palpies go away…

i think i may miss them

July 24, 2025

i hate that i can find the good
in almost everything

[i suppose this ability is there
to balance out the fact
that i can also find the most dire part
of almost any situation]

[and that there is probably the reason why
i hate my positive outlook
so much]

July 23, 2025

how can some songs
slap me in the face with memories
that i never wanted to see
again

and yet

some songs feel like
the best bear hug
from a friend
you haven’t seen in
ages?

the comfort/misery line
is razor thin

[and sometimes appears in
the middle of a measure]

but damn, these songs still slap

July 22, 2025

j’ai espère que
je pouvais penser
en français

i’m fairly certain that is incorrect
damn close to gibberish
but the sentiment still stands

i wish i wish i wish
i could think
in french

maybe i could understand and speak it better
then

[was french the language my Mom studied in school?]
[could we have practiced together
if life didn’t suck so hard
in 2001?]