i’m always so inspired
to write music
when i experience music
good music
damn
is music
always
always
always going to be
going to continue to be
an important part of my life
Month: July 2024
July 10, 2024
just write something
so this page doesn’t look so lonely,
so these words can have friends joining them
rather than setting myself up to
drop off random words
alone
July 9, 2024
my heart has been beating
louder
lately,
like it’s trying to remind me that i have anxiety
[as if i ever forgot]
like if it beats harder
it’ll keep away whatever haunts my waking nightmares
[as if that’s ever been true
for anyone
in history]
like my own hand is squeezing every last ounce
of a will to live
to breathe
to be
out of it —
the last reserves
until november
until perhaps genocides themselves die down
but what happens if / when / if
what i hope will be calming
does not come to pass, and instead fate
doubles my heart rate?
will it then cease?
will it then quit?
will it explode like it’s threatened to a million times over
or will it somehow beat louder
harder
faster
faster
faster
faster
faster
faster
July 8, 2024
it’s funny how gender-affirming sparkly nail polish can be
for me
for my estimation of in-between genders/
outside of the binary/
erring towards chaos/
creative/
forgoing gender
for individual
whatever/
in that mode
sparkles
on my nails
feels so
right
July 7, 2024
all these scraps of songs
portions of poems
i’ve written in fits and starts
bursts of energy
of creativity
of enlightened states of being
just to fizzle out
after one verse
one chorus
one instance
of what i truly want to say
and have nowhere to go
no how-to-end-it
no place to place my hat up on the wall and say
“i’m satisfied with my words”
July 6, 2024
Three Musings on Summer Thunderstorms:
the sky darkens to post-sunset dusky grey
and a lightning bolt passes by my window
the rumble of thunder
the stream of rain
and this summer storm is at it again
[i love this weather]
~~~
thunderstorms make me smile
interrupting the daily toil
of sunrise and shine and set and night
darkening a summer morning
or lightning-flash-brightening
midnight pitch black,
sounds escaping our atmosphere —
booms and cracks and the smacks of hard raindrops
cleansing the air
feeding the ground
offering greener hues when the showers subside
and summertime just isn’t summer
without
~~~
drench me in rain
fill my ears with thunderclaps
and my eyes with bright bolts of lightning
let me taste a summer storm
and offer my nose the delightful scent
of petrichor
as the pressure changes
and my heart grows
and i know
i’m present and whole.
July 5, 2024
kip drumming
kip playing piano
the puppy playing
the cat running away
and me humming/singing/writing
maybe lyrics
maybe poetry
maybe something to feel less numb
to this world and what it has already become
July 4, 2024
morning pages
in the evening
as the fireworks
sparkle and pop
boom and bang
shatter and static
and startle the puppy
awake
July 3, 2024
i’m careful
too careful
i know what could happen
[to anyone, not just to me]
and i work around those possibilities
those eventualities
but i never account for the time it takes
to account for all these things
i think i’ll be gone one hundred times over
before i live out all the lives i
planned for
July 2, 2024
into july
first day gone by
can’t exactly tell you why
i’m both calmed and concerned by
the month of
july
kipventures 