oh no
the sleepiness,
it’s taking over —
it’s not even 7 yet,
and already
i’m ready
for a nap
Month: March 2024
March 30, 2024
swag bags
filled with stuff
from a college i never attended
[maybe never will]
but still
a place of lovely memories
and blossoming friendships
even if
just for one event
in one
day
March 29, 2024
i can stare at pictures of me
and think
“what a baby”
while distincly remembering how adult i felt
at the time
now, i don’t know what i look like from the outside,
but inwardly,
i’m younger
than a baby —
a fetus maybe,
or not even yet imagined,
because i know so much less now
than i did
as a teen who grew up too fast.
March 28, 2024
focus
focus
focus
write the poems
and don’t get distracted
by the music
or the artwork
or the potential bagels
arriving
anytime
soon
focus
focus
focus
don’t be taken in by
the coffee beside you
or the potential trips
all coming up
or the gig
later today
or the stress
slowly
approaching
encroaching
focus
focus
focus
you just need 300 words
it’s not that difficult
it’s not that hard
it’s not a means to an end
but instead
a means to
a beginning
March 27, 2024
music
fills my ears
fills my soul
fills my life
[or at least is starting to]
[again]
March 26, 2024
today is for following the dopamine
[while still contributing to society]
wear whatever makes your heart thump with joy
even if that’s cotton harem pants/
a t-shirt from Pride 2020/
an old grandpa cardigan/
and iridescent rainbow sparkle tennis shoes,
and listen to pump-up music
[hype instrumental mix
since the search function isn’t working
and i really just want to listen to
funk]
and write until you don’t want to,
and drink coffee whenever the spirit moves you,
and hydrate because you love it,
and maybe even bring a sewing with you to work
[or just go straight for the alphabetization—
you know how much you love that]
[even though it seems never-ending…]
and just go
with the flow
and row
to the hype-beat of your own
[whatever]
March 25, 2024
sometimes
i hide from my grief
like i can feel it coming towards me
i’m looking over my shoulder
trying to outpace its steps
ducking into door frames in alleyways
hoping it’ll just walk past me
and keep on going
and i can be
free
but my grief is a part of me
it is inside me
it is made up of me
i can’t escape myself
[no matter how hard i try]
so why
can’t i let grief
just
ride?
March 24, 2024
it’s 8:30
and i’ve started my morning pages
[morning poems]
and i’d like a coffee, but i forgot to get one
and i’d like to water the plants, but it’s not time for that
yet
and i’d like to be known
but
i’d like to work outsides of the systems our society is based on
and working outside of those systems
is pretty much impossible
because everything is connected
just like everything is connected
to our Earth
here
and we just can’t stop things from going
the world from turning
the sun from rising and setting
and time from flying
and people from dying
and people from being born and born and born
and it sometimes feels so overwhelming
when you feel like the whole universe is in your mind
but turn it around
to the other side
you are one part of the universe
small
but
so
so
so
important
don’t hold things you don’t have to
let them go
and work for your little corner
of the great
connections
[we are all fractals of this planet]
March 23, 2024
a sudden sad
is it the rain?
is it my own mistake
in ordering our breakfast day?
is it my hormones
being completely out of balance?
is it my mood disorder
and some sort of need to meditate?
or is it living under late-stage capitalism,
watching systems that care more for profit
than for people,
and observing tragedies,
wars,
and genocides
half a planet away
that i almost almost almost almost feel
i have some power to stop,
when in reality
i absolutely
do not?
guess it’s probably the rain…
March 22, 2024
Lost
and still found
and still running around
spinning, flailing, trying to find something to hold on to
to keep myself from flying off out-of-control again
even though that’s what my vestibular system
wants so so so badly
wants to wake it up
and be a child
Again
kipventures 