June 8, 2023

fall up
into
the sepia-toned sky
reverse the wind
and take me to the fires
let me watch the world actually burn
instead of seeing the apathetic response
of humanity smolder

June 7, 2023

the need to control
to know
to make the flow go
where you want it to
go
can only end in
disaster

you will know what you are in charge of
you will know what you can accomplish and cannot
you will know where your limitations are
where your knowledge leaves off
where your expertise
ends

let other people
know
decide
flounder if floundering is needed
(because sometimes to succeed
the floundering really is what’s needed)
if they are the ones in charge
then they are the ones who should take charge
and you
stay in your lane
merge if merging is asked of you
but only if you
can
do

the rest is left to the universe

June 6, 2023

almost
accidentally
wrote
the date as
june 6, 3023
and i have to ask:
will we still be
here?
we
as in the human species
as in any species
at all?
here
as in on this planet
in this universe
a part of existence
at all?

i gotta ask
because at this rate
it seems
high key
unlikely
unless some changes
happen
swiftly

June 4, 2023

write
write as if your life
depended on it
write
as if you couldn’t start a whole day
without it
write as if you couldn’t find
your true identity
as a human being
unless you were to
write
write
write as if you just can’t do anything
but
write

~~~

am i actually
naturally
good?

or am i fooling myself
over
and over
and over again?

~~~

does it even matter tho?
if i get satisfaction?
if i feel pleased?

should i even care if anyone else deems it ‘good’
?

June 3, 2023

if only i could put all my hobbies
and helpfuls
into one basket of poetry—
the focus that comes from embroidery,
the loss of time and self
and feeling of fullness of art
of acting,
the power
and grace
of pulling one’s own body weight
up to an aerial apparatus
and seeing the whole room
spin
just this side of uncontrollably
around me,
and the expression
of my deepest most inner
mind
in a single poem
(or two)
(or three)

this is how you get to know me.

June 2, 2023

i feel sixteen again
the air around me tastes louder
brighter
coloring with so much
i can’t help but squint

perhaps it’s the neural pathways
refusing to trim
perhaps it’s the music
and late late nights inspiring
deep connection again

June 1, 2023

falling asleep
writing music in my mind
what a perfect metaphor
what an inspirational line
the rhyme scheme, incomparable
the tune passionate, flawless,
and i promise to remember it
when my eyes open
once more.

what was it again?

…lost it.