will i ever write
anything as honest
in the daylight hours
as i do near midnight
just before
sleep
takes me?
~~~
meditate
on the self
to escape from
the pressures
of the other
(but don’t blame the people–
they’re just trying to survive
just like you–
but how do we escape the systems
that are built
to trap,
hinder,
distance,
and depress
?)
~~~
how well do you know yourself
and your patterns
of self-sabotage?
~~~
these poems are starting to sound
a little angsty
but i swear i’m not in
a teen mood™ —
i’m just trying to find my footing
for a morning
after a morning
away
~~~
i have enough poetry
to always have something new
to slight-of-hand any reader
into thinking
i never miss a day
of writing
but i’m too honest for that jazz
so here i am
keeping my streak
but also writing poems
about skipping days
and i don’t know what that says
about me
(and if i should be thinking about that
anyways)
~~~
interesting
watching oneself
write poetry–
a line i thought
would negate/lessen
the last line
makes it feel
so much fuller
than before
i suppose that’s why i’m out here
writing poetry
every day
for 500+ days
as opposed to
studying
and analyzing
and obsessing
and perfecting
a thing
that comes
from the heart
[perhaps i should take that into account
in other aspects
of my life…]