Month: October 2021

October 31, 2021

/ HJ / Leave a comment

sunny Halloween
the most wonderful time of year
the spookiness will arrive tonight
(i’m sure of it)
but right now
i simply enjoy
fall
seasons
decorations
music
and
being married to a fellow spooky-season-lover

~~~

[it did,
it did,
it did arrive in the nighttime;
with so many costumes,
and flickering skull lights
casting shadows on half-buried {faux} skeletons,
and running out of candy
{eek!},
and sudden downpours
reflecting headlights in puddles on the ground,
and shuddering lights
which could be loose circuits
but i choose to believe
it’s our ghosts
traveling through the electicity,
and of course
our Halloween cat
chasing the ghosts
away]

October 28, 2021

/ HJ / Leave a comment

doing so much
yet feeling like i did
so little

doing things
is all fine and good
but when it comes time to talk to people…

healing takes a while
healing takes a long long time
healing is about more than just ‘feeling better’

October 26, 2021

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rain pouring
pounding
on our new (to us)
(though, in actuality, quite old)
(and yet not as old as the houses we grew up in)
house.
and clearly this little building has withstood
rain
and storm
and hurricane
and wind
and whatever else…
but it’s the big droplets on the a/c unites
that stick out of the windows
is really what
keeps me
awake

October 25, 2021

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there is not enough season
in spooky season
i’d like it to extend
from september 1st
till thanksgiving
(i mean, we could go until new years)
(or even all year ‘round)

(that’s the real gay agenda:
spooky season all year ‘round)

October 24, 2021

/ HJ / Leave a comment

i’ve been writing and deleting
for a few days now
[and drawing and erasing]
and i know this happens
no matter what;
it is inevitable at some point
to need to re-create
in order to finish a creation

but i’ve been starting and immediately stopping,
each burst of creative energy is met with
“ehhh…maybe not…”
to then need to forge a new path
ahead

and i am unsure if this means i am having trouble following a complete path
or perhaps i’m simply noticing earlier where paths will not lead
or maybe it means i’m putting everything down on paper[screen]
when i initially start
instead of editing myself in my head

whatever the reason
[be it “good” or “bad” or “neutral”]
it doesn’t stop the “now”
from being quite frustrating
every time.

October 23, 2021

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will i ever find my own voice
my pattern of poetry
my own way of writing
a style all my own
in this poem-a-day-venture?

do i even want to?

i want to find my own style
while drawing
because right now my “style” is simply
me not really knowing what i’m doing
and trying things out
and fading limbs when they err too close to the hands
and to the feet…

but i generally know what i’m doing
with writing
(or at least i was formally trained
for a time)
(though that doesn’t necessarily mean
anything
at all)

a style in visual art
to me
would mean
i’ve achieved choices
and a way to be recognized
and a general idea of what i’m doing
(and doing it with purpose)

but a style
in poetry
to me
would mean
pigeon-holing me
into one particular mode of voice
and this cacophony of styles
i suppose
is my choice
(and i guess,
at least right now
i do with a semblance
of purpose)

October 22, 2021

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woke up to harmonized meowls
identical cats standing off directly in front of our front door
the calling card of pre-fight yowls only losing their congruence
at the tail end
the cats’ tails puffs of agitation
and my “ps ps ps” no match for a turf war
(no matter if now i technically own this very turf
by silly white human law)

and our cat took no notice whatsoever.